Are Singles Who Use Dating Online Losers?



A couple of years ago I recall the looks of pity my friend Sarah would get when she mentioned she'd been trying internet dating sites. I must admit, at the time, I too thought she must be desperate. Couldn't she meet anyone in 'reality'? Didn't she meet people at work, or at parties?

I concluded that she must be either a bit weird or socially inept. Of course, you know I wouldn't be writing about this if she had never met anyone! Sure enough, she met a guy online, they fell in love, and now they're married.

Even one experience such as this in your own circle of friends is enough to make you question your hasty judgments. So, could online dating prove to be a mainstream way of meeting people, or would it remain in the margins of society? Is it humiliating to look for people online?

Well, let's say you're occupied with work all day (nobody eligible there), you go out a couple of times a week with your usual group of friends, and the rest of the time you're doing chores and sleeping; realistically, how many new people are you going to come across?

Even if you met one new person a week, how many of those are likely to be a good match? Maybe one in a hundred, and that's if you're lucky. At that rate, it would take a couple of years to even meet someone that you feel really attracted to.

So, let's say you look at these statistics and realize you need to up the odds of meeting someone. You do the rational thing and search a database of millions of people on a dating site. Isn't it still a bit like shopping for a laptop on Amazon?! Isn't it less 'real' than bumping into someone at a party?

Is email less 'real' than talking? Be honest, do you message people on Facebook that you haven't seen since your school days? Be even more honest, aren't messages and emails preferable when you're feeling a little nervous or anxious?

Chatting to someone new that you like the look is far from being easy! Actually, initiating a conversation is way easier online. No more stuttered introductions or lame chat-up lines. You get to think carefully about what you say and ensure that you present yourself in the right way.

In conclusion, not so long ago online dating seemed to me like a last resort for lonely people. Now, I'm convinced that it's for sure the best place to start. Let's say you communicate with just 10 new members a week as a result of using online dating sites - even if only one of those turns out to be eligible, you've increased your chances of meeting someone by 1000% over the natural method I mentioned earlier! !

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